You And I Are Hypocrites
*After much thought, I decided to post this. I am not attacking any of my friends so I hope nobody takes offense to this. I am considering if I should post this on my FB too*
I am glad that it is polling day tomorrow and that all these will end. I am sick and tired of all these bashing and personal attacks.
I am also sick and tired of various parties trying to stir up emotion.
More importantly, I am sick and tired of the complaining and whining and I thought to myself “goodness, I must be equally annoying when I complain!”
You and I are hypocrites.
I am not trying to promote any political party here but I think mostly we are ruled by our emotions and this unhappiness that seems so entrenched, it’s actually scaring me at times.
As many people have pointed out, we are all unhappy about something. When I take the train home, I feel irritated that it’s so crowded, when I order my food and I cannot really express myself in Mandarin I feel this immense frustration, and the list goes on.
I recognise that there are a group of people who are at the bottom rungs of this society and have to grapple with a lot more issues than the average Singaporean does, life is really tough for them. That’s another discussion topic for another day.
But for the rest of us…… seriously, is life that bad?
We say we want change but have we changed the way about how we view the world, and more importantly have we changed the way we view our lives?
Life is challenging, it’s not bad.
Bad is when your country is eschewed in a war or acts of domestic violence.
Bad is when you get raped by some random man and when you go to your local police and he rapes you too.
We read this in the papers and books but we always think it’s too far away for us to care about.
Yes, life is indeed challenging but it’s challenging everywhere, not only in Singapore.
People complain that the foreigners are taking their jobs away because they are cheaper. I think the argument for and against it is boring many (including me) to death.
Let me put forth another perspective to you.
Putting other things aside, some of the foreigners I have met are seriously more hardworking than the locals. They may have a language issue or they may have a different accent but they are definitely more eager and more competitive.
My father related to me that his young colleague in China who is my age, stood 17 hours in the train to go back to her hometown to visit her parents because the trains were so full. He told me that he told his colleague “my daughter has much to learn.”
What would you do if you had to do that? Complain on Twitter? Post some photo on FB on how crowded the train is? Blame the Government for not having enough trains so you can sit during the 17 hours?
Before we dismiss this as a one off incident, I think we need to look deeper that our competition is not the foreign talent. The competition is ourselves. Many of these people have this single-mindedness to succeed but you and I suffer from a mentality that “certain things are beneath us”.
Nevermind that my boss asked me to travel one hour back to the office to switch off my computer because I forgot (also true story in China), I will do it anyway. Some people may say that the person is mad. I say that this person is building his character.
The crux of the issue is not about whether I support foreign talent or not. It is the fact that I think we (myself included) are hypocritical.
We talk about wanting to help the poor, not leaving them behind but we expect the Government to do it. We expect policies to help them.
Sure I support that too but I would also like to ask the more important question.
What are YOU doing to help?
Have you signed up with any organisations to distribute food to the needy?
Have you ever donated your CNY money to buying essentials for the less well-off?
Are you volunteering at a centre to teach needy kids to ensure they break out of the poverty cycle?
Well you may not be able to change the world but do you not think it’s hypocritical when you complain the Government has left people behind but you have not done your bit to do anything for someone at all?
People complain that we have pursued economic growth and have become “cold, soul-less people” but yet I am sure they are the same ones who complain that their salaries are not moving fast enough.
People complain that houses are too expensive for them to afford and that a 30 year mortgage will eat into their retirement funds or that they cannot afford a house at all.
Yes I also complain that the houses are expensive, it’s ridiculously expensive. However, I am also reminded of the fact that my peers my age in another country rent a room in the city where they work. They are citizens of their country and they rent a room, they do not own a home.
If that happens to you, how would you feel?
My friends in another country do not even have public transport to complain about. They ride their motorbikes and scooters to work and trust me, it’s crappy when it’s extremely hot or when it rains.
Now when I put that into perspective, I really feel quite ashamed that I have been complaining so much.
We complain that the ruling party is not playing a fair game. Yes but seriously if the ruling party were some other party other than the men in white, do you not they think will also tilt the situation in their favour?
Let’s face it, Darwinism exists for a reason, nothing is ever fair because there will always be someone who is stronger and someone who is weaker. The fact that I have wavy hair and I am 1.62m while Heidi Klum looks the way she does is also not fair.
Do you play a fair game at work? Do you not try to get along with your colleagues, your bosses, assimilate into the culture of your company? Do you not alter your behaviour ever so slightly during performance review? For those of you who say no, well good for you. But in general, it’s not fair because at some level, you are also playing a game.
Even at a personal level, do you not make use of your personal relationships to ask for favours? Do you not dress well to leave a good impression? Are you not trying to tilt the situation in your favour? When you buy or sell something, do you not use your bargaining power to get what you want?
Are we not all hypocrites? Who are we to ask for fairness when we are not fair people ourselves?
We get to vote, some countries don’t even allow voting – now is that fair?
Yes, we definitely need to improve certain policies.
Yes, we definitely need to extend our help to those who are left behind.
Yes, some (not all) people running for the election need to be less arrogant.
Yes, the voices of the young should be heard.
I am not trying to swing votes (I don’t have the influence) and I am not interested in discussing policies here (so please don’t bombard me with that).
While I feel angry, frustrated, irritated over things in life just like you, I also feel unsettled by all these negativity that is surrounding me.
I am not an eternal optimist but since we have advocated for “checks and balances” I think we should first apply it to ourselves.
If you feel that your life sucks, maybe it’s not your life. Maybe it’s just your attitude.
